Helmut Thielicke quote

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

Proverbs 31:30

C. S. Lewis quote

"Lose your life and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favorite wishes everyday and death of your whole body in the end: submit (to God) with every fiber of your being, and you will find eternal life."
-C. S. Lewis "Mere Christianity"

Monday, August 7, 2017

Teatime with Inspiration

Finding inspiration for writing can be EXTREMELY difficult sometimes, and I can attest to that personally. I haven't had the proper inspiration to write anything at all for a good eight months, and it's starting to wear on me. When I'm not writing, I feel like there's a hole in my chest, something missing, something that's not right. So join me on this question to eradicate the root of this lack of inspiration.

Inspiration, as surprising as this might seem, isn't as hard to find as we think it is. For example, it can simply be - forgive this terrible cliche - found in the beauty of a sunrise/sunset, or in the threadbare carpet with fading designs someone took the time to create that has been laying on your kitchen floor for decades. It can be found in the most common of places. I feel like sometimes, though, we expect inspiration to be in the larger things, not mundane, every day occurrences. I feel that a lot of times we wait - or procrastinate - for that source of inspiration to do anything. In my case, I like to diagnose it as being lazy.

Lazy.

Yes, that's right... I said it.

Lazy.

What many of us call "lack of inspiration", is, in all actuality, a case of the lazies. It's quite easy and hard at the same time to cure it, but it sadly will never completely go away. However, it can be pushed away in the dark, cobwebbed and dusty closet part of your brain that is mostly forgotten.

Okay... Here's the secret... The cure... What we've all been waiting for...

Drumroll please

*drum rolls quite dramatically*

It's called writing.

*gasp*

I know... Shocking, right?

Here's what you do: you take a pair of headphones, the closest device that plays music, your preferred form of something to write on or with, and a darn good cup of tea or coffee. Turn the internet off, plug your headphones in, turn on any preferred music playlist, stare at your screen or wad of paper, and spout out the first idea that comes to you. Yes, it's that simple. And yes, it's that hard.

Here are some tips and strategies that seem to "cure" the writing lazies for me, if only for a little while.

1) Disconnect from wifi
          I know, this is a difficult one, but it works quite well. Personally, most of my distractions come from the internet. Even when I'm on pinterest, claiming that I need this board up for character inspiration *eye roll*, it almost always turns into a HUGE distraction. I go on a tangent of related pins and next thing I know I'm researching the cost of plane tickets to Antartica to save penguins. My antidote: don't use the internet.

2) Listening to inspirational playlists while writing
          Yes, music. It fills the listener with emotion. The composer toys with you as they take you on a ride filled with tears, grins, melancholy, etc. (If you are interested in any new, inspiring writing music, feel free to ask me because I have more than enough suggestions to give to last three lifetimes.)

3) If listening to music, keep it on a single playlist
          If I'm listening to music while I'm writing (which I always am) and the music is not on a queued playlist, I am most definitely going to get distracted changing and searching and switching songs. I find keeping my listening music on one playlist that I have specifically made for the genre I'm attempting to write or just any old playlist I don't mind, it helps a lot in diminishing many distractions. Don't switch from one playlist to another. Keep it on one.

4) Devote small amounts of time strictly to writing every day
          I know this seems obvious, but really, it's very most important. If you're anything like me, you find it extremely hard to find time to write. There is just not enough time in the day to do everything; school, work, etc. However, if you just simply devoted even ten minutes of writing a day, I promise your time will grow, as will your inspiration and your word count.

5) Create a writing nook for yourself
          Not only should there be devoted amounts of time to writing, but there should also be a sacred place where you put your pen to your paper. It gives a secure, comforting atmosphere that puts you in the writing spirit, so to speak.

I have many more tips, but these five that I have chosen are the most important to me and aiding me in the quest to rid the lazies! I sincerely hope that these help you and your never-ending journey to record the written word.

~Angelina



P.S.

PST... check out my new blog that I PROMISE to keep updated! It's more simple and easier on the eye. ;) Addicted to Pink


Tuesday, October 20, 2015

NaNoWriMo 2015!

November is almost upon us (yes, I'm sorry, I said it), and with November not only comes AMAZING weather, Christmas music, sweaters, heaters, and Thanksgiving, but also a month-long "task" for writers: NaNoWriMo. (Dare I use the gif I did last year when writing my NaNoWriMo post? ... Yes, I dare.)




For those of you doing the painful challenge of NaNoWriMo this year, I applaud and bow down to your dedication.  Some of you may be scratching your head and going... "NaNoWhatO?"  If that's you, let me explain.

NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month.  It's always in November of each year, and, as it implies, your goal is to complete a full novel in a month.  It's not a competition, but if it helps you to think that, it's a competition against yourself.  For youths (those of us who are 18 and under), it's easier because we get to set our word goal count manually.  It can be as low as 100 words to as high 100,000 words!  Not so easy for those of us who are "adults" (yeah, being an adult doesn't have as many benefits when it comes to that area).

For some (maybe most, maybe even all), NaNoWriMo can be quite... overwhelming, daunting, even scary.  But if you're equipped with the right knowledge and preparation, I promise that it will be less stressful and maybe even really fun. :)  Here are some things that I do before NaNoWriMo and during to prepare and meet my word goal.  Hopefully, it will be helpful to some of you.


#1.  Actually have an idea.  Yeah, it's hard, I know, even if you're planning to start NaNoWriMo the day before, it's a really good idea (obviously... duh.) to have an idea of what you're going to write.  Even if you don't have an idea at all, you can start by asking yourself some questions.  What genre am I writing about (or want to write about)?  The protagonist's personality vs. antagonist's?  Those kind of questions.  What I might do sometimes (ssshhhhh) is look at a few of my favorite movies or tv shows and take my favorite aspects from each and try to come up with an idea from that.  But that's only if I'm desperate and on the brink of brain deadness.  Pinterest always helps, too.  Looking at story inspiration boards really helps... more than I could ever fathom, really.

#2.  When you have an idea, outline it, plot it.  Yes, yes, I know, I know, you've heard this a million and a half times, and it can get... redundant.  I hate plotting.  I absolutely HATE it!  It makes me feel like I have to stick to this one thing, I have to get organized, and I have to stay in a box.  But it's really not like that.  I have found (for the unorganized and list haters out there like me *cough*) that if you plot the beginning, middle, end - along with critical turning points in the storyline (which I usually write in different sentences at the end of the document) - then it's not so bad and lets you be more flexible with your storyline.  But for those of us who are strict plotters, I applaud you and encourage you to do just that.

#3.  Character personalities.  This is an area that I feel I'm stronger in (unlike plotting *hides face in shame because I'm not one of those people who can plot extremely well*), and is actually one of my favorite aspects of "planning".  In order to have a good novel, you MUST have characters with strong personalities.  Not strong as in overbearing, but strong as in sound and dissectable (yes, I made that word up), not shallow and boring.  The key to this is really getting to know your character, feeling your character, putting yourself in their shoes.  I know with some characters it's a bit hard to "be" them, but that's where imagination comes in handy.  Character questionnaires are also a great way to better know and develop your characters.  You may have an awesome storyline, but if your characters are shallow and stink, then it's not worth the read.  The other way around, however, might be forgivable.  Stinky plotline maybe possibly be saved by amazing characters.  Trust me, it's worked for me in the past.

#4.  Set a schedule.  On the NaNoWriMo website, once you type in your set goal wordcount (for YWP, where you can set your word goal), it automatically tells you how many words you must write a day for you to finish on time with your set word goal.


#5.  (Optional, depending on what kind of a writer you are, if you can stand this sort of thing) Have inspirational music going on in the background as you write.  I know - for me, at least - that when there is righteous music going while I'm writing, it inspires me, makes me feel the emotions of what I'm writing, and also makes me feel that I can do (write) anything!  Also gets your brain juices flowing.  ;)  If you don't already do this, then I encourage you to at least try it.  If you're looking for good writing music, I have a list made out especially for writers, some of my music. :)

#6.  Write.  "Well, duh, Angie."  Yes, this one is a bit obvious (a bit?), but it can also be the most challenging.  Actually find time to write in the day.  If you're super busy, find time at night, or early in the mornings.  This is critical to meeting that word count goal.  (Well duh again)

#7.  Push through.  Sometimes when writing, we can get bored with out plot or characters or whatever aspect on the book (as a huge procrastinator, I find this very true for me).  We can even get discouraged at our daunting word count goal, or even the way the story is turning out.  But no matter what, PUSH THROUGH!  It will be totally worth it in the long run, trust me.  Here's a little tip I have for this "sickness": write another scene, switch POV, change your text color to something bright and different every time a new speaker or paragraph or scene comes on.  Believe me, these little things can actually help.  What I DON'T suggest doing: going on pinterest for inspiration.  If you do that, then you'll be stuck there for eternity.  Take it from the Queen of Procrastination, you don't want to do that.


As I said in the beginning of this post, NaNoWriMo can be really scary, but if you just tackle it head on with a clobbering stick, then you'll be just fine this November.  I applaud you, writers for NaNoWriMo 2015.  You are brave souls.


~Angie

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Sweater Weather Tag!

I was so graciously tagged by Kel Giese at A Teen's Life for this Sweater Weather Tag.  Thanks, Kel!!!  I love fall so much, it's my favorite time of year!  There's just so much about it that makes it the best.

So... Here we go, I guess.




1. Favorite candle scent- Ummm... I'd have to say Cinnamon Apple Cider, that's my favorite smell... EVER.

2. Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate- I love them all, but if I had to pick one, it would be hot chocolate. That's always been a favorite of mine. And chocolate is my favorite thing anyways sooooo...

3. What’s the best fall memory you have- My best fall memory is of my mom decorating for fall and letting me have the old cinnamon broom from the last year.  The smell was the best, and is always so homey to me. :)

4. Best fragrance for fall- I don’t wear perfumes or fragrances so I’m going to switch this around and tell you what my favorite fall smell is. I love the smell of rain and apples in an orchard.

5. Favorite Thanksgiving food- I LOVE green bean casserole, and sweet potato casserole. So either of those.

6. What is autumn weather like where you live- it starts out as a bit humid, balmy, but towards late October early November, it gets cooler.

7. Most worn sweater- This really really really soft long sweater that's loose knitted and is creamy white and has a grey design on it.  I love it mostly because of the long sleeves that go past my fingertips, those are my favorite. :3

8. Football games or jumping in leaf piles- LEAF PILES!  Unless it's the Florida/Georgia game...

9. Skinny jeans or leggings- I'd probably have to say skinny jeans, because I only wear leggings when I wear shorter skirts or dresses with boots.  So...

10. Combat boots or Uggs- Combat boots all the way!  They're more my style.  I've never like Uggs, or the name. XD

11. Is pumpkin spice worth the hype- *shrug* *averts eye contact* *cough* *starts typing in next answer*

12. Favorite fall TV show- DOCTOR WHO SEASON 9 *HEAVE HEAVE HEAVE*

13. What song really gets you into the fall spirit- Raindrops Keep Fallin on My Head. Wat? No, I dunno. I can honestly say that I don't know of any fall songs.

14. What do you want to be for Halloween- My family doesn't do Halloween, but one of the places I take dance does have a dress up day in October, so since I have a costume that looks like a mermaid dress, that's probably what I'll be.

15. Hats or Scarves- Scarves!  Even though I can't stand turtle necks or anything that suffocates me even slightly, I love scarves.

16. What’s your #1 favorite thing about fall- Being able to wear boots and jeans and sweaters again!  Yay!!!




My tags:


Nina D. over at La Nina...

Sam Tattershall at Onions, Lemons, and Apples

Mary P. J. at The Dreamer's Pen

Aspen Shannon at Texas Rebel Girl 



Thanks for reading!


~Angie

Sunday, September 13, 2015

WRITING PLAYLIST

I don't know about you, but when I write I HAVE to have music on in the background... It just gets my inspirational juices flowing.  I can't seem to write anything that's even decent without my groove tunes, not even school papers.  I know, I know, it seems like a problem, but it's not... to me, at least.  What I've done is made a bunch of playlists; one for school, and one for writing.  The playlist for writing has a bunch of subcategories intertwined...  For example, under writing music I have subcategories for genres in writing, such as action, emotional, ect.  It really does help, I've found, and I want to share some of my music with you. :)  And one big note, I do not always watch the movie from where some of these soundtrack songs are from... I usually find them by searching instrumental stuff... Some of the movies I listen to soundtracks from I do not agree with, watch, or even know.  Please keep that in mind as you go along with this list.  :)

So, without further ado...






(NOTE: Anything to do with the artist Audiomachine is background writing music worthy.  When you listen to them, you can just feel yourself soaring through different emotions. And Hans Zimmer, too. 'Nuff said right there.) 



Music for ACTION scenes



1. Hero - Kung Fu Panda OST  // This song is more fun than action-y, really. But it's inspiring, all the same.

2. Discombobulate - Hans Zimmer (Sherlock Holmes OST) // Anything from the Sherlock Holmes (the one from the movie with RDJ) soundtrack is AMAZING and totally worth listening to.

3. Wolf Suite pt. 1 - Danny Elfman // This is a sort of ominous and fast paced one.

4. King Arthur - Hans Zimmer // If you're looking for regal and righteousness with all the trumpets and horns, this is the song for you.

5. Septimus - Ilan Eshkeri (Stardust OST) // Reminds me of a horse riding scene for some reason...

6. This is Berk - John Powell (How to Train Your Dragon OST) // Not as fast paced in the beginning, but it gets more exciting after the first part.

7. Heart of Courage - TSFH // This song... no words... okay, maybe one: INSPIRING!!!

8. The Dream Is Collapsing - Hans Zimmer (Inception OST) // Embrace the dark side... the rush of a million heart beats crying for WAR! *battle cry* Ahem, great movie, btw...

9. Revenge of the Fallen - Transformers //

10. Road To Glory - Audiomachine // The name speaks for itself, peeps.

11. Catatonic - Hans Zimmer

12. Smooth Criminal - Dallas String Quartet // The instrumental for this song is great.



Uplifting mood music:

1. Carl Goes Up - Michael Giacchino (Up OST) // It's just a given, you can never not be happy when you're listening to anything from that blessed movie. Unless you re-imagine the scene... in that case, better grab a box of tissues, preferably the ones with the lotion infused into them.

2. Where's Hiccup - John Powell (HTTYD OST) // Beautiful soundtrack... beautiful music.

3. Another Dance - Dario Marianelli (Pride and Prejudice OST) //

4. Secrets - Dallas String Quartet

5. Hey Soul Sister - Dallas String Quartet

6. Peponi - Piano Guys

7. Baba Yetu - Peter Hollens // His version is the best.  I like to use this and Peponi when I'm writing scenes that are set in like African plains and stuff like that.



RIGHTEOUS music:

1. Time - Hans Zimmer (Inception OST) // This whole soundtrack is amazing and inspirational for just... anything. Seriously, check it out.  (P.S. 2Cellos do an amazing cover of this one)

2. I AM (Creation Overture) // From the album Music From the Story: Old Testament, this song just surges with RIGHTEOUSNESS... and INSPIRATION.

3. Honor - Hans Zimmer // This, just this, it's beautiful! *sobs* It makes me cry from explicit emotion.

4. A Special Bus - Murray Gold // Yes, this is a song from Doctor Who, but it's powerful, nonetheless

5. Redemption - Audiomachine // RIGHTEOUS

6. Winterspell - Thomas Bergersen

7. I Am the Doctor - Murray Gold // Another DW song... I know, I bet you're thinking "ANGIE, ENOUGH!"  I'm sorry... I'm so, so sorry...

8. My Strength - District 78



Melancholy/deeply moving music:

1. Chairman's Waltz - John Williams (The Memoirs of a Geisha OST)// A lot of strings in this one.  Need I go on?

2. Illumination - Jennifer Thomas // This one is half melancholy half righteous.

3. Fall From Grace - Kerry Muzzey // I would describe this first as happyish, but then it gets darker and a bit more ominous.

4. It's Hard to Say Goodbye - Michael Ortega

5. Red Warrior - Audiomachine

6. Letting Go - Patrick Doyle (Thor OST)

7. Rain - Brian Crain



HEART WRENCHING SONGS:


1. Save a Place For Me - Matthew West

2. Last Night - Skillet

3. Without You - For King and Country

4. Saturn - Sleeping at Last

5. All of Me - Matt Hamitt

6. Fall Alseep - Jars of Clay




That's just a small notch in the compilation of songs from my "writing music library", just a few out of many.  You should seriously check some of the songs out, though, if you haven't heard them.  They are amazing.  Most of them.  :P  As always, thanks for taking time to read!


~Angie




Saturday, August 22, 2015

Character Personalities

Starting school two weeks ago Monday, I found that it's actually not as long and tedious and boring as I thought 12th grade would be.  It's actually been quite enjoyable.  British Literature is my FAVORITE subject as of right now, and I'm sure that won't change.  :)  As a part of my literature, I'm doing a vocabulary study and I'm enjoying it immensely!  While reading it last week, I stumbled upon ten different personality traits and their meanings.  Naturally, being a writer, as I came across the personality types and read through them, I compared them to my characters and placed my characters in the personality types.  It helped  me, in a way, see the actual MIND SET of my characters, but not necessarily their individual PERSONALITY.  Note the difference, my dear readers.  So.  Away we go.


Egoist
(Me first attitude)

This type of personality is basically, what it says in parentheses, me first.  Not necessarily conceited and stuck up, just me centered.  Not over the top selfish, but just thinking about "their" needs first, not others' need.  Self-seeking, but not over the top.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: Abigail Blackburn, Nikki Taylor, Colton Flynn, Soleil Corsetti.

Egotist
(Height of conceit)

Don't get EGOTIST confused with EGOIST.  Egotists are more intense than egoists, more self seeking, definitely stuck up, over the top selfish, and - in a way - rude.  This type is all about them, with no room for other people in their thoughts.  This can sometimes even lead to more advanced and a more intense levels of egotistic behaviors, such as egomaniacs who are basically mad.  Literally... mad.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: Owen Tracy, Alex Wayne, Alister Reynolds. 

Altruist
(Let me help you)

Altruists are the some of the kindest people, putting other's needs before their own.  They are the type of people who are always there helping, doing whatever they can to make others comfortable.  But sometimes this can lead to self negligence, not on purpose, of course.  They are so concerned with needs of others that they can forget about themselves.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: Allison Beauregard, Gareth Corsetti, June Forwen, Theodore Yeshevsky. 

Introvert 
(Leave me alone)

Think of a turtle who hides in its shell and doesn't want to see people.  That's the introvert.  The introverted personality likes to be alone, or with a small selection of close people (and when I say small collection, I mean small collection).  They're timid, shy, and quiet people, and personally one of my favorite personality types.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: Jemma Corday, Jagger Bachar, Elsa Altobelli. 

Extrovert
(Let's do it together)

Now think of the opposite of introvert - the exact opposite - and then you have the extrovert.  Extroverts are loud (and when I say loud, I only mean it in the best way - being an extrovert myself :P), exuberant, excitable, and big people lovers.  They like being with others and can't be alone for too long or else they'll go through withdrawals.  Very people oriented, extroverts are need socialization, it being crucial to their survival,

Characters of mine that I would place in this category: Mallory Steele, Riley Blackburn, Aggie Lennox. 

Ambivert
(Neither extreme) 

Neither and introvert or an extrovert, Ambiverts are a happy medium.  They're not extremely outgoing, and they're not extremely closed off people either.  They're a good balance to anyone.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: David Cruse, Edwin Anniger, Jadon Ross Ives, Samantha Reynolds. 

Misanthrope
(People are no darn good)

Misanthropes believe that people are stupid and "no darn good!"  Everything people do is not good enough, complain worthy, and far less better than anything they could do.  Whatever someone else can do, they can do better.

Characters of mine I would place in this group: Alister Reynolds (again)

Misogynist 
(Women are no darn good)

Women haters, women dislikers, women scorners, annoyed by women... Shall I go on?

Characters of mine I would place in this group: Alex Wayne (if I had to place a character here, it would be him.  He doesn't hate women, he just thinks they're quite annoying.  Pft... Shows what he knows.)

Misogamist
("Marriage is an institution--and who wants to live in an institution?)

Free spirit is the word for this personality type.  They don't want to be tied down by obligations or priorities.  They prefer short term things, such as in the the case of relationships.

Characters of mine I would place in this category: Alva Callen 

Ascetic
(Self-denial, lonely contemplation) 

I see this type as either "woe-is-me", or the deep thinker and philosopher who contemplates life very deeply.  Self denial and living alone is the story of their life.  I wouldn't call them hermits... Well, yes I would.  They're a bit like introverts, except lonelier.

Characters of mine I would place in the category: Elsa Altobelli, Kaliana




So that's my list.  What do you think?  Where do your characters fall in these categories?

Thanks for reading!


~Angie <3




Saturday, May 23, 2015

Real Beauty

I'm going to talk about something really personal for all girls, I think. It's the issue of beauty and acceptance of yourself.  I know that this is something most girls - if not all - struggle with.  If it's not insecurity of your weight, height, width, or body, maybe it's your personality, the way you talk, something you don't like about yourself that you desperately wish could vanish and be replaced with a revised and perfect version of it.  Boy, have I been there.  Still am, actually.  It seems like I've been on this journey of finding my security for many years now, but as I look back now, I can see that I've come a long way.

When I was about eleven years old, I went through a major growth spurt and was always eating something.  I would eat as much as my teenage brother at the time during meals and would still have room for dessert.  By the time I was twelve, at 5'3 I weighed 180 lbs.  It didn't bother me much at all and I didn't think anything was wrong until one day while trying on jeans my mom had a serious talk with me.  As she handed me the size 18 jeans, she told me that maybe I should start to watch what I'm eating, and only put something in my mouth when I'm hungry.  I didn't really think anything of it until I began dance again after a few year break.  Let me tell you, at 5'4 and 180 lbs., fitting into a leotard is not something that looks good in a mirror... So I started watching what I ate, exercised, and let the rest go.  I started losing weight, but as the pounds fell off, my security did as well.  I  kept feeling that I was never thin enough, never at the right weight, my face wasn't pretty enough, my nose was too turned up, my dancing skills too amateur for my age, ect.  It didn't help that my two best friends were (are) absolutely GORGEOUS and perfect in every way.  I wanted to be in every way just like them, but the mirror always told me I would never be as beautiful.  My parents always encouraged me, though, that I was beautiful, I was perfect, and I didn't need to be a certain way to be gorgeous.  I tied down my happiness to being thin.  I told myself that I would be happy, automatically and always happy, when I would be down to my goal weight.

As I lost more and more weight, the doubt that brooded in the dark part of my mind gradually began to take over the way I looked at myself.  Every time I saw myself in the mirror, a cloud of darkness would envelope over me.  I told myself I was fat, I was ugly, I wasn't good at anything, my art was horrible, my dancing was childish, my writing was trash.  Some nights I would cry myself to sleep, or stand in front of the mirror, sobbing silently so no one would hear me.  It got bad at times.  Really bad.  For a while, I would refuse to eat as much as I should at mealtimes and nothing ever in between.  When that happened, my parents told me that if I didn't start eating, they would pull me out of ballet.  That scared me.  So for the reason of being pulled out of ballet - and for that reason only - I started to eat regular amounts again.  I wasn't happy about it, but I didn't want to give up my love either.  So I ate... unhappily, I might add.  Even though I had lost over fifty pounds and was down to a size 4 pants, I still wasn't satisfied.  I would always curse my big thighs, my enormous calves, and my big hips.

I had been battling off and on with bouts of "Yes, God, I know I'm beautiful!  I am and You made me perfect and beautiful in Your image.  I won't worry about it anymore," and "I am so ugly and fat... Why couldn't I be beautiful and perfect and pretty like my friends..."  My goal weight kept changing, going down and down and down.  I kept telling myself "just five more pounds."  Five more pounds later, "just another five."  And I didn't feel any happier, just the opposite.  My faith during this time became weaker, and that fire for Jesus I once had was starting to fade away, flickering and being blown out by the petty worries I had.  But then something happened... I was in the car with my mom and younger brother and a song came on the radio.  I'd heard it before, but the lyrics caught my attention and hit me in the stomach like a train going full force towards me.  It was just a few months ago, actually.  The song was "Who I am" by Blanca.  I'd heard it before, but never paid attention to it, and it was just background noise, if you know what I mean.  But at that moment of the day, I was just feeling so beaten down, like a heavy cloud was around me, because of my weight.  But a part of the song goes, "Another voice, another choice, to listen to words somebody said.  Another day, I replay, one too many doubts inside my head. Am I strong beautiful am I good enough?  Do I belong after all that I've said and done?  Is it real when I feel I don't measure up?  Am I loved?"

Those words described where I was emotionally at the time, and it couldn't have described me better.  The words that I heard through the speakers just touched me, and I started to cry.  Inside I was sobbing, the truth finally breaking through.  And when I heard the rest of the song, it just confirmed to me that I AM BEAUTIFUL, and not because of the way I appear physically, but because of WHOSE I am.  God's words finally broke through the ice of my hardened heart, and a revelation was revealed.  I don't need to be a certain weight to be beautiful, or a certain clothes size.  The world might tell me that I do, or that I have to wear this much makeup to look acceptable, or get a certain grade of score on tests, but I know what the real truth says.  The real truth, Jesus, tells me I am beautiful because I am his, and not because of what /I/ have done, but because of what /He/ has done.  I am beautiful.  I am loved.  I am good enough.  I am His.

Psalms 139:14 - I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

/I/ am fearfully and wonderfully made.  /You/ are fearfully and wonderfully made.  Fearfully... and wonderfully...


I'm not out of the forest yet (is anyone ever, truly?), but I am slowly - but surely - making my way back to that fire that once possessed me.  Over 5 years, 3 inches, and 50 lbs. lighter, I have finally come to understand that, truly understand that.  For years I had heard it, but never really understood it.  Key word: understand.  You might know it, but do you understand it?  Do you believe it?

It's taken me years and a lot of heartache and tears to realize this... As you read this post, I hope you understand and believe that...

You are beautiful.

You are loved.

You are good enough.

You are His.

You

Are

His...



~Angie





Sunday, May 3, 2015

random post about... random... stuff... yeah, I have no idea...

Dear readers...

....................................

I have no idea what to write right now... I'm serious...

I'm just typing here...

sitting on my bed

in my pink room

looking at how unusually neat it is...

it's so beautiful right now

I'm seriously wishing it would always stay like this...

I mean even my ceiling fan is clean

Why is my room this clean, you may ask?

two evil words



SPRING CLEANING


yes, you know those words

you know how dreadful they are

you know the way your mother tries to make those words sound apart of your everyday vocabulary

you also know the way she bribes you into doing stuff

no, not with money, not with things...

with just her words

just the way she goes, "oh my goodness! Look at this house it's such a mess! I feel so overwhelmed, I really need to clean up! It's going to take so long!"

and those eyes

those sad, convincing eyes

why?

I DON'T KNOW

then comes the guilt trip

she doesn't have to say a word to you

she doesn't even have to ask you sometimes

it's the guilt trip

and no one, and I mean NO ONE, is immune to those

not even dad

but anywho... my room...

yeah, so I'm just looking around my immaculate room, wondering why it can't always be this way...

my dad asks the same thing, and when he reads this, I can bet you he'll say "TOLD YOU SO"

my beautiful pink room

yes, it's still pink

I'm an older teenager and still it's pink

that's my secret superpower

making young girly things look and seem awesome

it's very powerful

that's why the Avengers haven't called me in yet

that's why they haven't recruited me

my superpower is too strong for them

it's too overwhelming for their brains

they are so "petty... and tiny..."

see what I did there ^^^

no?

heh... *cheesy grin*

my other super power is crazy awesome imagination. *rainbows spark from my hands*



There's a whole land inside my head

when I was little I never had an imaginary friend

I had an imaginary world

it was called Angie's Land

actually it still is

I visit there from time to time when I need "alone time"

that's where you'll find me when I zone out

and then suddenly pop out with these random and weird things that I have to say

I seriously don't know what's wrong with my little brain

sometimes I wonder if I'll end up in the nuthouse, teaching nuts how to dance

at least I'll be doing what I love most if I end up there.

^_^




~Angie

Friday, April 24, 2015

Modesty: My Take On it All

So recently I was waiting for my mom in the grocery store and was really bored... like insanely bored. There was a whole row of magazines in that isle and I picked up the one that looked the most interesting: Seventeen.  It seemed that the issue I picked up was especially for prom dresses, prom etiquette, prom stuff and whatevs.  Being a homeschooler, I probably won't ever go to prom (or even want to for that matter), and I'm completely okay with that.  So that being said, I just wanted to skim through the magazine to see what all this "prom stuff" was about.

I was certainly surprised when I finished looking through it.  Every single dress that was fashioned in the magazine was far from modest.  In fact, I couldn't even find one that didn't show off anything inappropriate.  And this is a magazine for young teenage girls?!  No wonder girls have problems they have today.  

Yeah, so here's my take on everything. 

Girls these days complain about not being treated right by guys, or not getting the respect they should.  But you know what the problem is?  The way /they/ - girls - dress.  Girls are dressing like prostitutes with no respect for themselves or their bodies.  It's degrading, not only for them, but the species called WOMEN.  There is no dignity whatsoever.  I've heard modesty being looked down on because it's too covering or too constricting or  too "goody-two-shoes" or whatnot.  But the thing they apparently don't get is MODESTY IS DIGNITY.  It shows people that you respect yourself and you aren't going to bend and stoop down low enough to just get some attention.


Wearing clothes that don't show 19/20th's of your leg and shirts that don't cling to your body so much that you can't breathe isn't a sign of bashfulness or hiding.  It shows that you R-E-S-P-E-C-T your body.  It also shows respect for you future husband.  There's this quote from Marilyn Monroe that I really like on this subject. "Your clothes should tight enough to show you're a woman, but loose enough to show you're a lady."  Even she got it (even through sometimes she didn't show it *shrug*).

Let me put it another way in a few quotes I found. 

"Dressing modestly doesn't mean I lack confidence, it means I'm so confident that I don't need to reveal my body to the world because I'd rather reveal my mind."  -Unknown

"Modesty isn't about covering up our bodies because they're bad, modesty isn't about hiding ourselves, it's about revealing our dignity." -Jessica Rey

I mean, seriously, modesty is about respect.  That's what girls should strive for, respect, cause here's the bottom line: that will last longer than any attention given in the here and now. There's this funny thing I read the other day about this same thing.  It said something like "dressing immodestly is like rolling around in manure.  Yes, you'll get attention, but from pigs."  If that doesn't say it loud and clear, then I don't know what does.

Wherever I go, and even if I'm "underdressed", I feel like I'm the girl wearing the most clothes.  What I'm trying to say is this: just because someone else does something (i.e. wears minimal amounts of clothing) doesn't mean that you have to follow suit.  I grew up being told to set an example for people, be the light and role model that this dark world doesn't see.  Stand up for your morals.  Stand up for what is right.  Be a role model.  Be a light in this dark world that sorely needs a glimpse of it.

So there's what I have to say about it... Modesty is about respecting /your/ body and having dignity... it also shows (in my opinion) that you're confident about /yourself/ and you don't need to show your body to the world for them to tell you how good it is. 


Anyways, thanks as always for reading,




Angie! <3


Modesty is not just about what you wear...check out my post on Modesty of the Heart

Sunday, February 8, 2015

One Last Time Q & A

I was kindly nominated by Sam Tattershal from the blog Onions, Lemons, and Apples.  Thank you so much, Sam! :)  So... here goes. 
"Last Time Q &A"

Rules: 

  1. You must be tagged to take the Q & A quiz
  2. You must tag and notify at least three other bloggers
  3. Answer the questions to the best of your ability
  4. And you must have seen The Battle of the Five armies to be tagged/take the quiz

NOTE: SPOILERS 


1. Tell your story of how you came to see the movies or got into Tolkien in the first place.
  It happened one night my dad and oldest brother were watching the Fellowship of the Ring, and I had NO IDEA whatsoever what Lord of the Rings was, so I sat out there - wanting to be a "big girl" and see an "adult movie" (*headdesk*) - and watched it, thoroughly confused but delighted!  It was then I was hooked for life. 

2. Who are your three favorite characters in the Hobbit? 
   Oh man, this is hard... I'm not going to say Legolas (like I usually would) because he's not in the book, only in the movie, and he's STINKY in the film.  So I'm gonna have to go with Bilbo, Fili, and Kili.
3. Did you cry at the Battle of the Five armies, and if so, which scenes and what type? 
  Cry... did /I/ cry?! HECK YEAH! It started when Fili was killed.  I watched in stunned silence as a tear trickled down my face.  What really got me was Kili and Thorin's death, and Thorin's speech.  I was weeping like a fool. 

4. Were the death's compelling to you, and if so, who's?
  I was very disappointed in Fili's death.  It was so... unworthy, if you will.  Kili's was very heartbreaking, Tauriel's role didn't help any with tears.  But Thorin's death... yes, it was very compelling.  His speech to Bilbo... *starts to choke up* that's what really did it.  

5. Overall, were you satisfied with the movie itself?
  Yes, I was very satisfied.  There were only two things I did not like: the addition of Legolas and Fili's minor death.

6. Describe the movie in one word.
  Majestic.


There are my answers and here are my nominees!

Anastasia at Inkspot 
Kayla at Concerning Writing
Faith at Princess Faith 



Thanks for reading!!!


~Angie <3




Sunday, December 28, 2014

A BLOG POST AT LONG LAST!

At last, I have emerged from my hermit like state of blog life and have decided to write a blog post! My bout of laziness has passed from me like the winds of the sea. Now the real question is what to write about... I'm afraid I haven't been very faithful these last few... months. So forgive me, dear readers. But never fear, I AM BACK!




I have exactly a week left until school starts back up again, and I have made a commitment to myself, one that I will start out having good intentions, but will probably end up not really following through. My lazy streak usually wins over with this statement: "Oh, you have time to do it later! Just relax right now. Vacation is almost over. You need to finish that season of Doctor Who before the new year." <--- Me... taunting me. That's my life during vacation. I CAN'T ESCAPE DOCTOR WHO.

But anyways, my goal is to get at least four chapters finished in a new book I am starting, or a book that I need to finish. Lately I've been going crazy writing short stories and skimping out on writing my books, that I haven't gotten anything done. But I've learned that if you're sneaky enough, you can slip those short stories into your actual book... IF they fit. Somehow my subconscious led me to write a bunch of these short stories for this new book I'm writing, and THEY FIT PERFECTLY. So I'm pretty psyched about that... my praise report of the month, I guess.

So, goal for this week: either finish at least four chapters in a book I'm writing or starting, or paint a masterpiece.

Yeah, going for the first of the two.



~Angie <3


P.S.
I am too lazy to read over this post, so if you find any typos... sorry. I'm just too lazy to read. Hey, I'm on vacation  people! :P